A teenage girl steals a lollipop from the candy store. A business woman steals a big digit of money from the giant company she is working for. Some people might see that the teenage girl is just doing a minor mistake while the business woman is doing a major one, a bigger crime, the one that should be put to judgement. But one way or another to see it, it is indeed still the same crime : stealing.
In our day to day life as a human being, little did we know and realise that we always throw our judgements. We think that we are better than others because we are open minded people. But sometimes, without even realising, we are doing it. It is something natural that comes to us as we are human beings and still living in this world and bumping with others. We always say, if I was her, if I was in her shoes, well guess what people : we will never know other person’s personal perspective no matter how hard we try. We are not her, we are not him, we are not them. We think we can imagine. We just can never do that. We just can not.
Some see a wife that forgives an abusive husband after he begs for forgiveness and say that he is a changed man. We probably think that she is stupid. We would throw comments like, “If I was her, I would never take that man ever again.” But it is forgiveness. Actually we can choose to forgive, no matter what kind of mistakes, how bad they are. When we choose to surround ourselves with letting go and to forgive, not only it is liberating. But we can let go and move on, try to do better things. It is a capability that takes effort. But when we finally nailed it, it is our superpower. It is hard, but it is fulfilling.
I grow up in a Christian family, with Christian community. I am not saying that I am more of a saint then others, I am as well as the world’s big sinners. But I guess my experiences of faith and hope with God got me into Grace and I can understand more about forgiveness from Jesus. I can see that He forgives everything and everyone. If He does that, who are we not to forgive others ?
Unlike rudeness and grudge seeking for vengeance, forgiveness takes effort. Big ones. It takes a lot of big heart and a big portion of suppressing your ego. I can find myself being so hard holding on to my anger that it is a tough one to forgive others. But I always come back to ask myself. Who am I. I am just one tiny dot in the universe with a lot of mistakes. If some of the people I hurt forgive me, why don’t I do my portion, as forgiving others ? No matter how bad, how damaged. I have to reconcile. Yes ?
Spread forgiveness. But most importantly, forgive yourself first.