Finding the joy in friendship looks like a simple thing, when I think in fact, it is not. It needs a lot of work and effort. It takes humility and compromises, and it takes connections. Sometimes, when I’m so tired during the day, by late afternoon all I want to do is just to go home, making myself some home made soul food and snuggle up in bed watching my favourite TV series without being bothered by any other human beings. But what if in that super tiring day, I have to dress up and get myself together and all smile and sunshine, just because I have to attend my best friend’s birthday dinner ? What if, I’m super tired but in fact, I have to attend my best friend’s fashion show ? See what I’m saying. Effort.
Some people calculate whether the people they’re with are worth something for them so then they’ll make the sacrifices to interact with them. It’s not wrong, nothing is wrong because people have their own perspectives and judgements, but any kind of friendship you’re stuck with today is a work. You have a job. And that job is being a good kind of friend. It’s like working in a company. Your boss will appreciate you more if you’re not measuring and choosing which one is in your job description and which one is not. If you’re doing everything, even though it’s not your job to do, either your boss will promote you and respect you or give you a raise. You’ll be a popular employee. Happy boss and happy work mates.
Same goes in this life. You’ll find the joy in friendship when you’re willing to interact with people even in your most tiring day and still try to smile and make jokes. They’ll love you and surround you or even care for you because you’re such a nice person to be with. You’re travelling with a friend who’s been a pain in the ass trying to make you take photos from every angle but in return you’ll have great photos yourself and memories to take everywhere because that friend is also doing your photos. You’re paying the dinner bill all the time but you’ll have a friend who’ll be there for you and kick somebody’s ass because that friend owe you that much, might have less money but more courage and loyalty.
Sometimes, you can’t choose your friends. You’ll just happen to be friends with some people. Those people might make you laugh or cry, pissed or LOL-ing like crazy. But if you’re doing your best job as a good friend, sometimes the ones that been pissing you off are the one who’ll be there until the end of the line.
Friendship is a work of effort and compromises and the list is endless. But when you’re trying to make the best out of it, you’ll find the joy and beauty in friendship. Never close yourself up for a new adventure and meeting new people. It’s the one thing life will take you places you’ll never imagine before.
Meet one of my best friends. We travel together and shop together a lot. He might pissed me off sometimes, but some other times, he’ll stick up for me. People think we’re dating. God forbid, we’ll be friends for a long haul and other friends have come and gone. But still, we fight, make up, laugh, cry and all other feelings and emotions. Still, we stand here as the two friends that’s hard to break.
When some friends piss you off and you can’t get away from them, just drink your latte and laugh it off. Shake it off. Move on. You’ll feel better and still be friends.
Peace and love, S.